What is your Fun Quotient?
Anne Coscarelli, Ph.D.
Most people have heard about their Intelligence Quotient (IQ), and recently Newsweek reported about an Emotional Quotient (EQ), but what about a Fun Quotient (FQ)?
What is an FQ?
Basically, it is the amount of time you spend doing things that are light-hearted or fun. It's the amount of time you dedicate to whatever you consider to be fun: working on hobbies; games; sexual activity; dancing; going to the theater or movies; watching television; reading; surfing the internet; spending time with friends; traveling; and playing sports. You can actually calculate your FQ by keeping track of the number of hours you spend in a week doing things that are fun and then applying that number to the following equation:
______ ÷ 168 hours per week
= ______ Fun Quotient (# of fun hours per week)
Does your FQ number seem high or low? My guess is that for most people this percentage is pretty low. Why is this? One reason may be the number of obligations that people have. The chart below represents a typical week:
| Activity | Hours spent per week |
Percent
time |
| Sleeping | 56 |
33% |
| Self- grooming | 11 |
6% |
| Food preparation & eating | 21 |
12% |
| Working | 40 |
24% |
| Commuting to work | 5 |
3% |
| Exercise | 3 |
1% |
| Maintenance (e.g. shopping for groceries) | 14 |
8% |
| Total | 150 |
87% |
You will notice that this list does not take into account many common activities including: taking care of children; communicating with family members; participating in community service activities; taking part in religious worship; learning new skills, and so on. When you add in these activities, there is very little time left for fun. It's no wonder I hear people reporting that they are tired and worn out.
Most people, myself included, could use a prescription for improving their FQ. If you are a cancer patient, your FQ may be around zero as your schedule has been rearranged to accommodate visits to the doctor, time for tests and treatment, and time for getting support. If you are a family member or close friend of a cancer patient, your FQ also may have been altered by the impact of the disease and its treatments.
Why does having some fun on a frequent and regular basis matter?
Improving your FQ is an important part of cancer treatment. Cancer treatment often requires a great deal of time and energy and must take priority over other activities. Life is reshuffled. It is not uncommon for patients and caregivers to become focused on the tasks of getting well as defined by their doctors and other medical professionals. It is important, however, to recognize that dealing with cancer and its treatments usually creates a psychological drain on the people involved. Cancer treatment, by and large, is an unpleasant experience and it easily can have a negative impact on everyone's quality of life. It can affect your psychological status, and you may find that feelings of anxiety and depression dominate your thoughts. Being involved with negative activities over time can whittle away at your sense of well-being and hope. This process also can arise for the same reasons and with the same intensity for family members and caregivers. Relationships that once were strong can be weakened if this negativity goes unchecked for long.
While a good FQ can help keep negative emotions from developing, it also can have a much greater impact. Scientific studies increasingly indicate a healing effect of laughter and light-hearted experiences on the mind, body and soul. They appear to bring about changes in the brain chemicals that alter mood and immune functions.
Many cancer patients have shared the ways in which their perspective on life changed after they were diagnosed with cancer. One of the first things they often realized was that they were spending too much time doing unpleasant or non-rewarding activities. If this thought has occurred to you, it is time to calculate your FQ. If it is small, then try these strategies and let me know how they work for you.
Build an FQ activity into every day
As you make your plans for the week, include at least one fun activity for every day and then just do it!
Make sure you have some "transportable" FQ activities
Recreational reading or quiet hobbies such as needlepoint or crossword puzzles can be taken to doctor's appointments or other situations when you may find yourself sitting and waiting.
Identify a time each day to do an FQ activity
It's often easier to find a time for some fun when the day's work is finished. A little light-hearted amusement before sleep can do a lot to reduce stress and increase the likelihood of a peaceful night. A favorite drink, a chat on the phone, a good book, a game of backgammon, or a few minutes in an Internet chat room are examples of things that can be built into the daily plan prior to bed time. You don't have to follow the same routine every night.
Begin to think of FQ as an important part of staying healthy
After a cancer diagnosis, many people tend to let the fun activities fall by the wayside because they are viewed as being "non-essential". Others think that because cancer is a serious disease, all of life should become serious, too. If you spend all your time working and/or dealing with the presence of cancer, your quality of life will erode. Having a little fun each day will protect your quality of life, and actually may improve your ability to handle the aspects that are difficult. If you can think of your FQ as part of your prescription for staying mentally and physically well, you may be better able to increase it and make it an integral part of your daily life - now and later.
Identify an FQ Buddy to remind you
Kings and Queens had court jesters to raise their FQs. Look for a friend or family member who understands the importance of daily fun and ask him or her to help you. Similarly, if you are a family member or close friend of someone with cancer, identify yourself as an FQ Buddy. If you both like to play backgammon, for example, remember to set aside specific and regular times to play. Give each other a reminder call to just do it!
Make FQ signs
The paper industry has made it easy to make reminders. Get a packet of bright Post-Its and write FQ messages on them. Put one on your dashboard, a bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, and the back of the toilet. Make new signs with a different color every couple of weeks. These signs will be your reminders.
Keep a diary of all activities for a week
Keeping a diary to assess how you actually spend your time can be quite revealing. You might be surprised to find out how much time you spend doing certain activities. This assessment may help you realize that you can spend less time doing some of the activities that are under your control and are negative. If possible, ask someone else to take on one of these activities once a week. For example, if you hate folding laundry, see if someone else can do it for you once a week. Use this "new" time for an FQ activity.
Set priorities and goals and implement a plan
Like any new endeavor, setting priorities and making a plan helps to accomplish what you want. Think of your day as being a chest of drawers. The most important demands on your time go in the top drawer. The least important demands go in the bottom drawer. Put the middle demands in the middle drawer. Be sure to put at least one FQ activity in the top drawer.
Every weekend make a defined plan for a significant FQ activity. Once you have this time set aside, guard it as a sacred appointment.
Re-evaluate your strategies after a few weeks. As is true with any type of change, adding fun to your daily life will take concerted effort and re-evaluation. Don't forget to look at your plan every so often and recalculate your FQ. If you have not achieved your goals, reassess, problem-solve and try again. If you need some help, talk to a friend or a mental health specialist who can assist you increasing your FQ.
Anne Coscarelli, Ph.D.
Wallis Annenberg Director’s Initiative in Psychosocial Oncology
© Anne Coscarelli, Ph.D. All rights reserved.
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